Tuesday, August 22, 2017

I want to stop existing 

I want to die. I don't want to keep living in a disgusting body that I hate. I'm a giant piece of shit that likes to pretend like her life has value, but I don't feel that way. I don't fit in. I'm fat and ugly and awkward and stupid and no one really loves me. How could they love me when they don't even really know me? I hide so much trying to make people like me. I hide all my ugly, and still the little bits that aren't so bad aren't good enough for anyone to love. They only like the fake bits that I work so hard to create that I feel eternally exhausted. I have no friends, and my family doesn't really want me around. I'm living some lie that I'm some person I'm not. I'm so fucking depressed. I try lately to pretend I'm ok and be grateful and positive, but I don't feel that way. I fucking hate myself. I hate my life, and I wish it would end. I beg for it to end. Please. I just want to stop existing. I'm so tired that I can barely drag myself through another day. I want it all to end. 

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