Nothing is new. Depression is still here, shocking I know.
My husband sucks. He’s a rude insensitive selfish asshole who tempts me to seek attention elsewhere. He fucking sucks, and I think after surgery I need to think some things through. I need an ally in life and not just another responsibility all the fucking time.
My college friends are pieces of shit. They will never include me properly, and I literally don’t even like any of them but I’ve given them too much of my energy for far too long. I am officially done with them at this point.
I don’t know how to make friends. I want to be picky. I want to have a social life. I’m tired of Covid. I’m tired of my husband. I’m tired of friends who either don’t know me and expect me to be strong or have expectations for me that aren’t me. I don’t want to live up to them anymore. I just want to be messy and flawed and that be ok. I want someone to fucking vent to.
This summer will be a major test on my life.
