Sunday, November 6, 2016

Recovering

Sometimes people think because your a pretty girl that you must not have feelings. That because you're strong they don't have to watch out for them. It sucks to be a girl. It sucks to be rejected harshly and by someone who seems to enjoy the process of rejecting you so much. 

Daniel is insane. I know that. But it doesn't make it hurt less. I don't know why or how I even got attached, but the severe rejection hurts...

A house full of miserable people... I didn't belong there. Maybe I don't belong anywhere. The things I have to do to fit in with people like that are too much for me. I feel like a freak or a reject. Like the same old sad girl in high school that didn't know how to act. I guess I still don't... 

Do I think of the ex as a fallback or a real option?? What kind of life do I want?? 

I guess this is the process for figuring those things out. It's miserable. But I get one step closer each time. I know it's no Adam for me, and now no Daniel. 

If Jay doesn't hang out with me today, then he's off the list too, and if we hang out and nothing happens, same outcome. 

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