He gives me the attention I so desperately want.
"What are you doing? But what are you doing?"
Stil trying to get over things, I guess. But maybe that's just an excuse to do what I want. Right now I want to feel pretty and important for someone to spend time on and not taken for granted. And I'm tired of asking for those things.
I want him. I want the one night he says I can have. I know the boost it'll give things... And I want to feel all of it.
Adam will be a disappointment for eternity. So the solution is to severely and drastically lower current standards. But I don't want to just walk away. I still want to be his friend for some ridiculous God-forsaken reason. And I want to have a new boy toy and him to see it like I had to see he and Hannah.
I want everything this would give me... Except the guilt.