Tuesday, July 26, 2016


Today I had a cup of coffee, some
Shiritake noodles with meat sauce, some watermelon, and a few bites of miscellaneous things. 

I didn't eat a bite until 8pm. 

I want it back. All of it. All of the ED. 

My body is the only thing in my life that holds me back. It's the only thing I'm unhappy with at the moment. It's the only thing I can't fucking stand that causes me anxiety and depression. 

I can remember a time when losing 5 pounds would take a week tops. I need to find that motivation again. I am fat and gross right now. I need to be skinny for me and him and the whole world. 

I'm hungry. It's 3am and I need to go to sleep. I want to feel hungry forever. 

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